On the bus today, I tried to think of an epiphany moment. My mind was empty-all I could think of was the reading I have to finish over lunch. The bus rumbled down the road, the song “Pompeii” playing on the radio under the conversations of the passengers. In ballet today, we were practicing pirouettes (I’m in an intro class xD). I feel like a little girl in ballet, thrilled by the studio’s tall windows and rosy walls, by the pale pink slippers and pliés. But near the end of the lesson, as we practiced our dizzy spinning, I could not balance. I knew I was doing it wrong, ballet is hard, and I’m bad at it. Anyway, I had lost my excitement over ballet, over the movement and the atmosphere of the room. And I was feeling down over failing to spin perfectly, when I would never be a prima ballerina. Ballet is difficult, I am in awe of ballerinas, and I can afford to laugh at myself falling over, and trying to spin again.
Is it possible to have a mini-epiphany every day? A sudden insight into yourself and the world which never occurred to you before? If so, can all these little realizations ever accumulate into a finished, final understanding of the world, or do they just approach infinity? If one hundred million is just as close to infinity as one, can a multitude of mini-epiphanies bear any significant weight on your worldview?